Tooth And Nail: A Review

27th March, 2014.

*Yaaaaaawns* … !

Politely, obviously … 

You know, I do like to rent movies, occasionally.

No, really.

I’ll be frank: I’m job hunting at the mo.

But you knew that, if you’ve been reading this for a while.

You’d also have realised that — occasionally — I’ve enough money put aside to buy an iTunes gift card.

Credit I can eke out on the occasional album.   And — equally — on an occasional film rental: I realise there’s possibly better things to be spending my rare, spare cash on.

But equally, there’s a lot of nasty habits I could be indulging: too much beer, or — ahem — Columbian Marching Powder!

No, I try and rent a movie.

One I can watch*, possibly enjoy, and certainly write about, afterwards.

You’ve possibly noticed that, too, if you’ve been paying attention.

At ANY rate … ?   At any rate, I’ve gone and gone it again: rented a film.

Tonight’s rental … ?   Was the 2007, horror film that is Tooth And Nail.

And much as I’d like to say it’s credit well spent … ?

I’m none too sure if I can … 

~≈Â≈~

28th March, 2014.

Phew …

Or Phewish, at any rate … !

I’ve sort of had a busyish day, today: a visit from an old friend, semi-expecting another — if all goes well — and a visit from my sister, Ruth, and my nephew, Jude.

All fun and games … !

Now I’ve some breathing space, though … ?

I’ll carry on tell you about the film I caught last night, the 2007 film, that is … Tooth And Nail.

And yes, I’m thinking there’s better.

~≈Â≈~

Set a few years from now, Tooth And Nail is set in New York: in a New York after Earth’s been hit by an apocalypse of mind-shattering proportions.

When petrol runs out.

And follows a small group of survivors who’ve holed up in an abandoned hospital.

They’ve got problems: they’ve little to eat, fresh water when the only filters are topped up, and only so much weaponry and ammunition.

They’ve also got another issue.

There’s a group of incoming cannibal raiders coming over the horizon:  one led by Michael Madsen, with Vinnie Jones as his second in command‡.

Which is possibly when you know things are getting serious …

~≈Â≈~

Now … ?

There’s better … ?

Yes, I think there is …

I’ll happily confess to have see a few low budget flicks in my time.

Outpost springs to mind, as does Boy Wonder and any early film by Ben Wheatley.

And, as much as I’ve found some great low budget films, I’ve ALSO found a gear-grinding clunker or two^.

And … ?

Well, while I don’t think Tooth and Nail is a complete dead loss — barring the idea of an apocalypse being the fuel running out, Vinnie Jones and Michael Madsen are the best things IN the film — it’s not exactly a stand-out film that’ll be generating endless hordes of franchised follow-up.

Frankly … ?

Tooth And Nail is watchable: once.

But too bland to be watchable, twice.

Tooth And Nail

★☆☆☆

*        Frankly … ?   I’d’ve like to have rented Kathryn Bigelow’s Strange Days: except, unfortunately, it’s not on the iTunes Store†.   I’ve given some thought to signing up for a Netflix account, as they seem to have a DVD version available, and the service is on my Apple TV.   But that means handing out my credit card details to another service: and keeping cash in my account when I’d rather spending it on food, drinking and bills, before I spend it on entertainment.

†        Fortunately, an old friend has offered to let me borrow their copy.   I’m truly grateful!   But also a touch disappointed that Apple didn’t have a copy when it seems to be on both Amazon and Netflix.

‡        Vinnie Jones’ overacting is … well, ham shaped … 

^        Inception and Area 51 spring to mind, here.   As does the phrase ‘Avoid them like the plague’.